Facebook launches I’M SAFE button for gingers in future heatwaves

A spokesperson for Facebook has announced that an I’M SAFE button has been launched for ginger people during times of hot weather in the United Kingdom. 

According to Facebook’s Head of User Safety Melanie Carrott, the feature will have rolled out to all relevant ginger-haired users by the end of June 2018.

She said: ‘It’s scientifically proven that ginger people are incredibly vulnerable to sunburn, and so naturally in future hot conditions in Britain friends and family are going to be very concerned for their loved ones.’

‘Therefore, our new algorithm will be able to detect profile pictures where the hair colour is ‘brighter than auburn’ but ‘darker than Basildon peroxide.’

‘These are the people who fall into the spectrum of redhead danger according to our researchers.’

Essex-based ginger Samuel Tuft told our Chief Reporter that the development was ‘amazing news’ after his family witnessed him turning into an oompa-loompah during a particularly hot spell in 2013.

He added: ‘In one day alone I must have received 150 messages from people concerned that I was sunburnt.’

‘Even when I took a picture to prove that I was OK, everyone scrolled past it as they were mortified and apparently it put some of them off their dinner.’

According to a source within Facebook, gingers will be given 48 hours to respond after the point where daytime temperatures hit 30 degrees Celsius.

If this period elapses without so much as an emoji, an ambulance will be dispatched to their home address with a tub of Nivea.

She added: ‘Naturally anything they post on Facebook Live will be ignored – everybody watches that shite except us.’