The exact location of the President Of The United States Donald Trump is currently unknown after he accidentally deported himself in a national security crackdown.

According to reports, Trump signed an emergency executive order relating to border control and the need for dangerous, unhinged individuals to be kept out of the country, and within ten minutes ICE officials were bundling him into the back of an armoured vehicle.

One White House source said, ‘The President was keen to consolidate his border position after the mid-term election results meant that his Mexico wall would now be marginally less possible than finding one of Big Foot’s morning dumps in Yellowstone National Park.’

‘Unfortunately, he specified in the exact wording that those with a questionable ancestry should be removed at once, and his Loompaland heritage meant that he was immediately a prime candidate.’

It is thought that Trump still has access to Twitter, with his official account posting, ‘Very good work by my hard-working ICE people. Very, very good. Where am I?’