There have been further calls for the leader of the Labour Party Jeremy Corbyn to resign today after footage emerged showing that the Islington MP could have prevented the 1988 massacre at the Nakatomi Plaza in Los Angeles.
In the grainy CCTV footage that has been obtained by us, Corbyn is seen trying to negotiate with the terrorists who had taken over the building in an attempted robbery of non-negotiable bonds that were contained in the company vault.
After making some further enquiries about the events of the evening, a source told our Chief Reporter that Corbyn’s reckless actions could have actually resulted in a number of hostages being killed.
Just giving his name as ‘Al,’ he said, ‘An off-duty police officer had just arrived to start dealing with the situation, when suddenly Corbyn tried to give up his identity to the terrorists.’
’He must have had a thing about beards – the lead terrorist had a bit of a Gerry Adams thing going on.’
’At one point he even tried a charm offensive and called him ‘Bubby’ before using an anti-Semitic slur.’
’He referred to the Jews as ‘heebs’ and even used the phrase ‘camel jockeys’ – disgusting.’
’Fortunately the whole incident played out with a minimal loss of life. I even killed one of the attackers in the aftermath and got over a crippling fear of firing a weapon, which was nice.’
In a further shocking development, a spokesperson for Momentum has defended Corbyn’s actions.
He said, ‘Yet again, Jeremy’s actions are being taken out of context.’
’At the time, he believed that the lead terrorist had also been involved in a plot to kill Robin Hood, and just two decades later he tried to bump off one of Britain’s most popular child wizards.’