A spokesperson for Wetherspoons has confirmed that their Continental Breakfast will be renamed ‘Morning Foreign Muck’ after Brexit.
In an attempt to protest about what would happen if we remain tied to the European Union in some capacity, the revamped dish will cost £79.95 per head, with an extra £30 supplement if the diner wishes to have a second croissant.
Also, any diner who orders the dish will be allocated a member of staff to sit at their table and say, ‘tsk, tsk’ every time they take a bite.
He added, ‘We need to keep people buying British as much as possible, and our Full English Breakfast will only contain British produce from British animals that are reared by British farmers using British crockery and British cutlery served by a British waitress who only speaks British.’
‘Everything will then be washed up using Fairy Liquid that has been specially produced away from Proctor and Gamble’s factory to ensure that it is only formulated by the fair hands of British workers.’
‘Our American pancakes will be flown in directly from San Francisco, taking advantage of our hugely massive free trade deal with Donald Trump, and this dish will be available for £1.95.’
A source within the chain has also revealed that the entire menu will be capitalised.